[Intro]
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Cm Fm Eb G/D
May I have your attention, please?
Cm Fm Eb G/D
May I have your attention, please?
Cm Fm
Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
Eb G/D Cm Fm
I repeat, will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
Eb G/D
We're gonna have a problem here
[Verse 1]
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Cm Fm
Ya'll act like you never seen a white person before
Eb G/D
Jaws all on the floor like Pam, like Tommy just burst in the door
Cm Fm
And started whoopin' her ass worse than before
Eb G/D
They first were divorced, throwin' her over furniture
Cm Fm
It's the return of the, oh wait, no way, you're kidding
Eb G/D
He didn't just say what I think he did, did he
Cm Fm Eb
And Dr. Dre said, nothing you idiots
G/D
Dr. Dre's dead, he's locked in my basement
Cm Fm
Feminist women love Eminem
Eb G/D
Chickachickachicka Slim Shady, I'm sick of him
Cm Fm
Look at him, walkin' around, grabbin' his youknowwhat
Eb G/D
Flippin' the youknowwho, yeah but he's so cute though
Cm Fm
Yeah I probably got a couple of screws up in my head loose
Eb G/D
But no worse, than what's goin' on in your parents bedrooms
Cm Fm Eb
Sometimes I wanna get on TV and just let loose, but can't
G/D
But it's cool for Tom Green to hump a dead moose
Cm Fm
My bum is on your lips, my bum is on your lips
Eb G/D
And if I'm lucky you might just give it a little kiss
Cm Fm
And that's the message that we deliver to little kids
Eb G/D
And expect them not to know what a woman's clitoris is
Cm Fm
Of course they're gonna know what intercourse is
Eb
By the time they hit fourth grade
G/D
They got the Discovery Channel don't they
Cm Fm
We ain't nothin' but mammals
Eb
Well, some of us are cannibals
G/D
Who cut other people open like cantaloupes
Cm Fm
But if we can hump dead animals and antelopes
Eb G/D
Then there's no reason that a man and another man can't elope
Cm Fm
But if you feel like I feel, I got the antidote
Eb G/D
Women wave your pantyhose, sing the chorus and it goes
[Chorus]
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Cm Fm
I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
Eb G/D
All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating
Cm Fm
So won't the real Slim Shady, please stand up
Eb G/D
Please stand up, please stand up
Cm Fm
'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
Eb G/D
All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating
Cm Fm
So won't the real Slim Shady, please stand up
Eb G/D
Please stand up, please stand up
[Verse 2]
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Cm Fm
Will Smith don't gotta cuss in his raps to sell records
Eb G/D
Well I do, so fuck him and fuck you too
Cm Fm
You think I give a damn about a Grammy
Eb
Half of you critics can't even stomach me
G/D
Let alone stand me
Cm Fm
But Slim, what if you win, wouldn't it be weird
Eb G/D
Why, so you guys can just lie to get me here
Cm Fm
So you can sit me here next to Britney Spears
Eb G/D
Shit, Christina Aguilera better switch me chairs
Cm Fm
So I can sit next to Carson Daly and Fred Durst
Eb G/D
And hear 'em argue over who she gave head to first
Cm Fm
Little bitch put me on blast on MTV
Eb G/D
Yeah he's cute, but I think he's married to Kim, hehe
Cm Fm
I should download her audio on mp3
Eb G/D
And show the whole world, how you gave Eminem VD
Cm Fm Eb
I'm sick of you little girl and boy groups, all you do is annoy me So I have been sent
G/D
here to destroy you
Cm Fm
And there's a million of us just like me
Eb G/D
Who cuss like me, who just don't give a fuck like me
Cm Fm
Who dress like me, walk talk and act like me
Eb G/D
And just might be, the next best thing, but not quite me
[Verse 3]
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Cm Fm
I'm like a head trip to listen to, 'cause I'm only givin' you
Eb G/D
Things you joke about with your friends inside your livin' room
Cm Fm Eb
The only difference is I got the balls to say it in front of ya'll
G/D Cm
And I don't gotta be false or sugarcoat it at all
Fm
I just get on the mic and spit it
Eb G/D
And whether you like to admit it, I just shit it
Cm Fm
Better than ninety percent of you rappers out can
Eb G/D
Then you wonder, how can kids eat up these albums like Valiums?
Cm Fm
It's funny 'cause at the rate I'm goin' when I'm thirty
Eb G/D
I'll be the only person in the nursin' home flirting
Cm Fm
Pinchin' nurses asses while I'm jackin' off with Jergens
Eb G/D
And I'm jerkin' but this whole bag of Viagra isn't workin'
Cm Fm
In every single person there's a Slim Shady lurkin'
Eb G/D
He could be workin' at Burger King, spittin' on your onion rings
Cm Fm Eb
Or in the parkin' lot circling, screamin' I don't give a fuck
G/D
With his windows down and his system up
Cm Fm
So will the real Shady, please stand up
Eb G/D
And put one of those fingers, on each hand up
Cm Fm
And be proud to be outta your mind and outta control
Eb G/D
And one more time loud as you can how does it go
[Post-Chorus]
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Cm Fm
'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
Eb G/D
All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating
Cm Fm
So won't the real Slim Shady, please stand up
Eb G/D
Please stand up, please stand up
Cm Fm
'Cause I'm Slim Shady, yes, I'm the real Shady
Eb G/D
All you other Slim Shadys, are just imitating
Cm Fm
So won't the real Slim Shady, please stand up
Eb G/D
Please stand up, please stand up
[Outro]
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Cm Fm Eb G/D Cm Fm
Haha, guess there's a Slim Shady in all of us
Eb G/D Cm Fm Eb G/D Cm Fm Eb G/D Cm Fm Eb G/D Cm Fm Eb G/D
Fuck it, let's all stand up
[Fade Out]
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Cm | Fm | Eb | G/D | Cm | Fm | Eb | G/D 